We went to Yekaterinburg

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

More Emotional Stress Than Necessary

Throughout this adoption process, I knew that my emotions would be going on a rollercoaster rides. There would be many ups and downs, highs and lows, related to paperwork, meetings, waiting for calls, seeing pictures perhaps, and a variety of other things. However, I didn't expect what would happen next as I waited for our referral call.

Sometime in December I had mentioned to my job that Mike and I were going through an adoption process and that the time frame was not quite clear. I wanted to give them a heads up that I would possibly need a maternity leave from my job towards early summer or late fall. It was uncertain at that time. At first the administrators were ok with this. However, I was told that I would not be receiving maternity leave, they have no such thing. Women who give birth go on a paid disibility leave. As an adoptive mother, I would be choosing to stay home to care for a family member and would as such go under Family Medical Leave Act. This leave of absence is not paid. Therefor I was being treated quite differently than a fellow coworker who was pregnant with her first child. I saw no difference between giving birth and choosing to adopt. Why should the laws? At that time, I did question the administration because I wanted some clarity to the situation. I understood but still did not think it was fair. I let it go, however fellow coworkers continued to discuss it and the administration did not look kindly on the situation. I understand that I cannot expect them to go against the law but this law certainly does not seem fair. What a mess I fell into!

To make matters worse, in March I had a misunderstanding with an administrator and was given a warning for yelling at a fellow coworker. I wonder who of you have never raised your voice to a fellow colleague. I wouldn't even call what I did yelling. Well, I guess a few people did not like what was occurring with my job and questioned my whole attitude and whether I could perform my job duties. I was again spoken to about my attitude. I was also put on a paid leave of absence while they "investigated" the accusations. What a joke. Everything I said to try to sort out the mess, I was told was wrong and they didn't believe me. Can someone tell me how you refute someone's "feelings" about your attitude? They didn't ever question how I did my job. It was all about how I talked to people and how I acted. Well, they did their investigation and in the end I chose to quit. Why fight for a job that you are no longer happy doing and where people don't seem to appreciate what you do? It wasn't worth it.

The only trouble- financial uncertainty could effect our adoption. The judge in Russia needs to see that we make a certain amount of money per year and with me not having a job, we were just below that mark. Now I need to find a job as soon as possible to make the court happy. But, where should I look for a job and what do I really want to do? That certainly is a great question. Hopefully it will get sorted out quickly so that our adoption will go through quickly as well. We want to be back in Russia before Christmas. I need a job now to sort out the financial paperwork right away. Wish me luck in this endevour.

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